Jen Lancaster has 11 audiobooks on Listento.it, narrated by 4 narrators, with an average listener rating of 4.2★ across 23 ratings. The most-rated is Bitter Is the New Black.
Bitter Is the New Black
Summary
Jen Lancaster was living the sweet life - until real life kicked her to the curb. She had the perfect man, the perfect job-hell, she had the perfect life - and there was no reason to think it wouldn't last. Or maybe there was, but Jen Lancaster was too busy being manicured, pedicured, highlighted, and generally adored to notice. This is the smart-mouthed, soul-searching story of a woman trying to figure out what happens next when she's gone from six figures to unemployment checks and she stops to reconsider some of the less-than-rosy attitudes and values she thought she'd never have to answer for when times were good. Filled with caustic wit and unusual insight, it's a rollicking listen as speedy and unpredictable as the trajectory of a burst balloon.
©2006 Jen Lancaster (P)2009 Penguin
I Regret Nothing
Summary
New York Times best-selling author Jen Lancaster has lived a life based on reinvention and self-improvement. From Bitter Is the New Black to The Tao of Martha, she's managed to document her (and her generation's) attempts to shape up, grow up, and have it all - sometimes with disastrous results.... Sure, Jen has made mistakes. She spent all her money from a high-paying job on shoes, clothes, and spa treatments. She then carried a Prada bag to the unemployment office. She wrote a whole memoir about dieting...but didn't lose weight. She embarked on a quest for cultural enlightenment that only cemented her love for John Hughes movies and Kraft American Singles. She tried to embrace everything Martha Stewart while living with a menagerie of rescue cats and dogs. (Glitter...everywhere.) Mistakes are one thing; regrets are another. After a girls' weekend in Savannah makes her realize that she is - yikes! - middle-aged (binge watching is so the new binge drinking), Jen decides to make a bucket list and seize the day, even if that means having her tattoo removed at 100 times the cost of putting it on. From attempting a juice cleanse to studying Italian, from learning to ride a bike to starting a new business, and from sampling pasta in Rome to training for a 5K, Jen is turning a midlife crisis into a midlife opportunity, sharing her sometimes bumpy - but always hilarious - attempts to better her life...again.
©2015 Jen Lancaster (P)2015 Penguin Audio
Stories I'd Tell in Bars
Summary
Unfiltered. Unapologetic. Older, but not wiser, Lancaster goes back to basics in this hilarious essay collection about everything from taking community policing classes to accidentally getting high with her waiter after a fancy dinner. These are the tales she'd tell if she met you in a bar... if she weren't too lazy to put on pants and go to a bar. Offering advice ranging from how to remain happily married to a man who refuses to blow his damn nose already to not creating An Incident at the cheese counter during an attempt at Whole30, she's you, only louder. As she details the chaos that will surely ensue if she has to learn to operate one more television remote control, you'll want to settle in and pour yourself a tall one. Because what's more fun than hearing a friend share her favorite stories?
©2017 by Jennifer Lancaster. (P)2019 Brilliance Publishing, Inc., published by arrangement with Folio Literary Management.
Welcome to the United States of Anxiety
Summary
A Wall Street Journal bestseller. New York Times bestselling author Jen Lancaster is here to help you chill the hell out. When did USA become shorthand for the United States of Anxiety? From the moment Americans wake up, we’re bombarded with all-new terrifying news about crime, the environment, politics, and stroke-inducing foods we’ve been enjoying for years. We’re judged by social media’s faceless masses, pressured into maintaining a Pinterest-perfect home, and expected to base our self-worth on retweets, faves, likes, and followers. Our collective FOMO, and the disparity between the ideal and reality, is leading us to spend more and feel worse. No wonder we’re getting twitchy. Save for an Independence Day-style alien invasion, how do we begin to escape from the stressors that make up our days? Jen Lancaster is here to take a hard look at our elevating anxieties, and with self-deprecating wit and levelheaded wisdom, she charts a path out of the quagmire that keeps us frightened of the future and ashamed of our imperfectly perfect human lives. Take a deep breath, and her advice, and you just might get through a holiday dinner without wanting to disown your uncle.
©2020 Jen Lancaster (P)2020 Brilliance Publishing, Inc., all rights reserved.
Such a Pretty Fat
Summary
A NOTE FROM JEN LANCASTER: "To whom the fat rolls...I'm tired of books where a self-loathing heroine is teased to the point where she starves herself skinny in hopes of a fabulous new life. And I hate the message that women can't possibly be happy until we all fit into our skinny jeans. I don't find these stories uplifting; they make me want to hug these women and take them out for fizzy champagne drinks and cheesecake and explain to them that until they figure out their insides, their outsides don't matter. Unfortunately, being overweight isn't simply a societal issue that can be fixed with a dose healthy of positive self-esteem. It's a health matter, and here on the eve of my fortieth year, I've learned I have to make changes so I don't, you know, die. Because what good is finally being able to afford a pedicure if I lose a foot to adult onset diabetes?"
©2008 Jen Lancaster (P)2009 Penguin
Bright Lights, Big Ass
Summary
Jen Lancaster hates to burst your happy little bubble, but life in the big city isn't all it's cracked up to be. Contrary to what you see on TV and in the movies, most urbanites aren't party-hopping in slinky dresses and strappy stilettos. But lucky for us, Lancaster knows how to make the life of the lower crust mercilessly funny and infinitely entertaining. Whether she's reporting rude neighbors to Homeland Security, harboring a crush on her grocery store clerk, or fighting-and losing-the Battle of the Stairmaster- Lancaster explores how silly, strange, and not-so-fabulous real city living can be. And if anyone doesn't like it, they can kiss her big, fat, pink, puffy down parka.
©2007 Jen Lancaster (P)2009 Penguin
My Fair Lazy
Summary
It's a JENaissance! The New York Times best-selling author of Pretty in Plaid gets her culture on.
Readers and listeners have followed Jen Lancaster through job loss, sucky city living, weight loss attempts, and 1980s nostalgia. Now Jen chronicles her efforts to achieve cultural enlightenment, with some hilarious missteps and genuine moments of inspiration along the way. And she does so by any means necessary: reading canonical literature, viewing classic films, attending the opera, researching artisan cheeses, and even enrolling in etiquette classes to improve her social graces.
In Jen's corner is a crack team of experts, including Page Six socialites, gourmet chefs, an opera aficionado, and a master sommelier. She may discover that well-regarded, high-priced stinky cheese tastes exactly as bad as it smells, and that her love for Kraft American Singles is forever. But one thing's for certain: Eliza Doolittle's got nothing on Jen Lancaster - and failure is an option.
©2010 Jen Lancaster (P)2010 Penguin
Pretty in Plaid
Summary
In Pretty in Plaid, Jen Lancaster reveals how she developed the hubris that perpetually gets her into trouble. Using fashion icons of her youth to tell her hilarious and insightful stories, listeners will meet the girl she used to be. Think Jen Lancaster was always "like David Sedaris with pearls and a super-cute handbag" (Jennifer Coburn)? Think again. She was a badge-hungry Junior Girl Scout with a knack for extortion, an aspiring sorority girl who didn't know her Coach from her Louis Vuitton, and a budding executive who found herself bewildered by her first encounter with a fax machine. In this humorous and touching memoir, Jen Lancaster looks back on her life - and wardrobe - before bitter was the new black and shows us a young woman not so very different than the rest of us. The author who showed us what it was like to wait in line at the unemployment office with a Prada bag, how living in the city can actually suck, and that losing weight can be fun with a trainer named Barbie and enough Ambien is ready to take you on a hilarious and heartwarming trip down memory lane in her shoes (and very pretty ones at that).
©2009 Jen Lancaster (P)2009 Penguin Audio
By the Numbers
Summary
The New York Times best-selling author of The Best of Enemies serves up a hilarious new novel of the "sandwich generation". Actuary Penny Sinclair has a head for business, and she always makes rational decisions. Knowing that 60 percent of spouses cheat and 50 percent of marriages end in divorce, she wasn't too surprised when her husband had an affair. (That he did so with a woman their daughter's age? Well, that part did sting a bit.) She just made sure she got everything in the divorce, including their lovely old Victorian house. And as soon as her younger daughter has her hipster-fabulous wedding in the backyard, she's trading it in for a condo in downtown Chicago.... Well within the average market time in her area, Penny gets an offer on the house. But then life happens. Her children, her parents, and her ex come flying back to the nest, all in need of Penny's emotional - and financial - support. Spread thin, Penny becomes the poster child for the "sandwich generation" when all she really wanted to do was make managing director, buy a white couch, and maybe go on a Match.com date....
©2016 Jen Lancaster (P)2016 Penguin Audio
If You Were Here
Summary
The fiction debut of the New York Times best-selling author of My Fair Lazy. Told in the uproariously entertaining voice readers have come to expect from Jen Lancaster, If You Were Here follows Amish-zombie-teen- romance author Mia and her husband Mac (and their pets) through the alternately frustrating, exciting, terrifying - but always funny - process of buying and renovating their first home in the Chicago suburbs that John Hughes's movies made famous. Along their harrowing renovation journey, Mia and Mac get caught up in various wars with the homeowners' association, meet some less-than-friendly neighbors, and are joined by a hilarious cast of supporting characters, including a celebutard ex- landlady. As they struggle to adapt to their new surroundings - with Mac taking on the renovations himself - Mia and Mac will discover if their marriage is strong enough to survive months of DIY renovations.
©2011 Jen Lancaster (P)2011 Penguin
Twisted Sisters
Summary
Reagan Bishop is a pusher. A licensed psychologist who stars on the Wendy Winsberg cable breakout show I Need a Push, Reagan helps participants become their best selves by urging them to overcome obstacles and change behaviors. An overachiever, Reagan is used to delivering results. Despite her overwhelming professional success, Reagan never seems to earn her family's respect. Her younger sister, Geri, is and always will be the Bishop family favorite. When a national network buys Reagan's show, the pressures for unreasonably quick results and higher ratings mount. But Reagan's a clinician, not a magician, and fears witnessing her own personal failings in prime time. (And seriously? Her family will never let her hear the end of it.) Desperate to make the show work and keep her family at bay, Reagan actually listens when the show's New Age healer offers an unconventional solution… Record Nielsen ratings follow. But when Reagan decides to use her newfound power to teach everyone a lesson about sibling rivalry, she's the one who will be schooled…
©2014 Jen Lancaster (P)2014 Penguin Audio