Penelope Bloom has 18 audiobooks on Listento.it, narrated by 12 narrators, with an average listener rating of 4.2★ across 13 ratings. The most-rated is His Banana.
His Banana
Summary
My new boss likes rules, but there's one nobody dares to break.... No touching his banana. Seriously. The guy is like a potassium addict. Of course, I touched it. If you want to get technical, I actually put it in my mouth. I chewed it up, too.... I even swallowed. I know. Bad, bad, girl. Then I saw him, and believe it or not, choking on a guy's banana does not make the best first impression. I should backtrack a little here. Before I ever touched a billionaire's banana, I got my first real assignment as a business reporter. This wasn't the same old bottom-of-the-barrel assignment I always got. I wasn't going to interview a garbage man about his favorite routes or write a piece on how picking up dog poop from people's yards is the next big thing. Nope. None of the above, thank you very much. This was my big break. My chance to prove I wasn't a bumbling, clumsy, accident-prone walking disaster. I was infiltrating Galleon Enterprises to follow up on suspicions of corruption. Cue the James Bond music. I could do this. All I had to do was land the position as an intern and nail my interview with Bruce Chamberson. Forget the fact that he looked like somebody carved him out of liquid female desire, then sprinkled on some "makes men question their sexuality" for good measure. I needed to make this work. No accidents. No disasters. No clumsiness. All I needed to do was hold it together for less than an hour. Fast forward to the conference room before the interview, and that's where you would find me with a banana in my hand. A banana that literally had his name on it in big, black sharpie. It was a few seconds later when he walked in and caught me yellow-handed. A few seconds after that was when he hired me. Yeah. I know. It didn't seem like a good sign to me, either. Contains mature themes.
©2018 Publishing Bloom LLC (P)2018 Tantor
Knocked Up by the Dom
Summary
My darkest secret? I let a stranger dominate me in the most intimate way possible. He gave me three things that night: His first name, the sweet taste of submission, and his baby. Now my Dom is back and this time he won’t stop until I’m his. Kylie One wild and reckless night changed my life three years ago. I got a taste of what it meant to be with a real man—how just a whisper could ignite my desire, and his commanding voice could have me kneeling at his feet in submission. He was my everything and I only knew him for a few hours. But like everything good in my life, it went up in flames. When I learned the truth about him, I ran as fast as I could. I’d like to think I would’ve stayed if I knew about the baby… but I doubt even that would’ve stopped me, not after what I learned. Damian It has been three years since she got away. Three f*cking years. I knew she was mine from the moment I saw her. I had to have her. To touch her. For one night, I owned her submission and she loved every second. I finally found her again. There’s not a chance in hell she’s going to slip away this time. Not again. Not ever. I’m going to bring her into my world. I’ll give her everything she wants and all the things she didn’t even know she needs. She’ll be crying out my name. She’ll be dreaming of spankings, handcuffs, and blindfolds. I’m going to dominate her in every way imaginable. Mind, body, and soul. Especially her body. But it’s not going to be as simple as I thought because she has a son now… my son. *As always, this is a totally SAFE, full length book with a happily ever after, no cheating, and plenty of steam. *The cover model, Travis D. does not in any way endorse the content of this book.
©2017 Publishing Bloom LLC (P)2018 Brilliance Publishing, Inc., all rights reserved
Her Cherry
Summary
How'd I meet her? Well, a gentleman never brags. Thankfully, I'm no gentleman. First, I paid for her cherry (pie, but that's not the point). Next, I deflowered her. After that? I left my business card and walked out like I owned the place. Yeah, you could say we hit it off. Hailey: How did I meet William? He walked into my bakery, bought a cherry pie, stole a vase of flowers - I still have no idea what he wanted with them - and left his business card. Before I say what I did with the business card, I should clarify something: William couldn't have walked into my life at a worse time. My bakery was failing. My creepy ex refused to leave me alone. Oh, and I was a 25-year-old virgin, a fact my friends refused to stop hassling me about. William was stupid hot, the kind of hot that makes women do stupid things. The kind of hot that made me think crazy things. So I called him. Maybe it was against my better judgment. Maybe I was stepping into a disaster waiting to happen. I knew I was in trouble when he chuckled in that deep, sexy voice of his over the phone and said, "I'm still craving your cherry. Do you deliver?" Contains mature themes.
©2018 Penelope Bloom (P)2019 Tantor
His: A Bad Boy Mafia Romance
Summary
I’m wrong for her in all the right ways. Everyone in the city knows who I am: Vincent Citrione, top capo of the most powerful crime family in the city. If you’ve got two brain cells to rub together, you’re scared sh*tless of me. As for women, I give them the hardest, dirtiest f*ck of their lives before showing them the door. They know better than to expect more. Commitments? F*ck ‘em. At least, that was my motto until I caught her snooping in the wrong place at the wrong time. Aubriella. I wanted her to be like all the rest of the girls. I wanted to forget her. But I can’t forget her lush curves…or the soft moans spilling from her lips. She thinks she can say no to me and get away with it. She thinks she can walk away after what she’s seen. But one taste and I know she’s going to be mine. I don’t care what it takes. I get what I want. And I want her. This is a standalone, full-length mafia romance with a filthy-mouthed, possessive bad boy. Happily ever after guaranteed.
©2016 Publishing Bloom LLC. (P)2018 Brilliance Publishing, Inc., all rights reserved.
Her Bush
Summary
Everything went wrong when I trimmed his bush. And no, it's not what you're thinking. I'm a professional. The client hired me to trim a bush in his garden for a party. I accidentally turned it into something that rhymes with "a big rock and walls". Imagine my surprise when the art world decides it's a masterpiece. Were my raging hormones the cause of my bush sculpting blunder? I mean, who would blame me if they were? After meeting Harry Barnidge for the first time, my brain went straight to cavewoman mode. There were undignified fantasies of being bashed over the head and carried off to a cave, a significant loss of vocabulary, and maybe even a little drooling. But I can't focus on that. On him. I need this job to make my little sister's dreams come true. Until now, I've managed to screw everything in my professional and personal life up, but I'm determined to make this work. So when Mr. Heartstopper offers to help me manage my accidental art career, it's impossible to say no. It's like the old saying goes. If you erect it, they will come. Or something like that. Contains mature themes.
©2019 Penelope Bloom (P)2020 Tantor
Single Dad Next Door
Summary
My grandfather left me his business with one insane condition: I need a wife and two kids. Too bad I’m a divorced single dad. Cue my ex-wife’s best friend moving in next door. And then mix in a few bad decisions. What do you get? A complicated, sexy mess. SANDRA The list of reasons I should stay away from my neighbor is about as long as his... wrench. He’s a dirty mechanic, he’s a single dad, and he can’t seem to keep his shirt on for more than five minutes. Did I mention his ex-wife is my best friend? Yeah. Reid Riggins is absolutely, one hundred percent, the last person in the world I should get involved with. Even if he is heart-stoppingly gorgeous with strong, powerful hands that could rip my clothes off with ease. Not that I’ve imagined that, of course. The point is I don’t want anything to do with him. He can stay in his stupid garage with his stupidly cute son and hit things with wrenches all day. He can keep on wearing those blue jeans that fit him just right for all I care. Except I may have told a white lie to my eccentric, rich parents. I may have told them I’m engaged to a wealthy businessman, and now they want to meet my fake fiance. Unfortunately, Reid might be the only guy who’s willing to play along. No problem. It’s just for a few days. Just to get them off my back. What could go wrong? *This is a full-length, standalone fake marriage romance. No cheating or cliffhangers, and as always, Happily Ever After guaranteed.
©2017 Publishing Bloom LLC (P)2018 Brilliance Publishing, Inc., all rights reserved.
Miss Matchmaker
Summary
What happens when the matchmaker meets her match? Better question: What doesn't happen? A small town is the last place I ever thought I’d find myself, but I’m desperate to save my failing business, and a mysterious client makes an offer I can’t turn down. She wants me to match her with the man of her dreams, and if I pull it off, she’ll pay me more than I can imagine. But when a cowboy everybody calls “Country” welcomes me to town with a “get lost” and a side of drop-dead gorgeous, well, things get a little more complicated. I mean, what kind of woman wouldn’t go following a guy like that back to his ranch? And what kind of woman wouldn’t go marching up to tell him off, even if he was shirtless? Between my insane client and my inability to stay away from the cocky cowboy, I have my hands full. And Lucas Tate, the man my client wants? It turns out he's also my cowboy. As always, this is a totally SAFE, full length book with a happily ever after, no cheating, and plenty of steam.
©2017 Publishing Bloom LLC. (P)2018 Brilliance Publishing, Inc., all rights reserved.
Single Dad's Hostage
Summary
Getting kidnapped isn’t so bad. At least, it’s not when your captor is a billionaire with a huge...heart. He saved me from my abusive ex-boyfriend when I couldn’t get away. Now he owns me, and he wants to get engaged. The only problem is, my ex isn’t letting me go so easily. Dean Sharp is a breathtakingly gorgeous, arrogant, and an asshole. At least that’s my first impression when he knocks out my abusive boyfriend. When we get home, I know my boyfriend’s going to make me pay for what Dean did. But Dean Sharp isn’t done meddling in my life. Not even close. He grabs me from outside my motel, throws me in his car, and says I’m his hostage. He doesn’t want money, though. What he does want is the last thing I would’ve ever expected. He wants me to pretend to be his fiancee so his daughter and brothers don’t suspect anything. And he says he won’t let me go until he’s sure I’ll never go back to my abusive boyfriend. The thought of crossing my boyfriend terrifies me, and I’ve spent the last two years trying not to even think of what he’d do if I left. He owns me. At least he did until Dean Sharp stepped into my world. He saved me from my abusive relationship, and now he wants to give me something even bigger: an enormous diamond ring. How can a girl say no to that? *This is a full-length, standalone fake marriage romance. No cheating or cliffhangers, and as always, Happily Ever After guaranteed.
©2017 Publishing Bloom LLC. (P)2018 Brilliance Publishing, Inc., all rights reserved.
Single Dad's Virgin
Summary
My billionaire boss needs me to do something absolutely crazy. He wants me to pretend we’re engaged. But I can’t say no, or he’ll lose his daughter and I’ll lose my job. Fine then. I’ll wear his stupid ring. I’ll be the perfect fiancée for one month. There’s only one problem. I don’t want to stop pretending. Housekeeper for a stunningly handsome, male-model billionaire? Yep, that’s my job and it’s as dreamy as it sounds. I get to live in his ridiculously huge mansion, and all I have to do is take care of his mom and daughter, who are practically family. To top it off, the notoriously bossy Mr. King has been away for business since I started. But he came home today. Liam King looks like he stepped out of a GQ magazine, and the way he undresses me with his eyes should be illegal. He ignites my body. Every part of it. But It doesn’t matter how tempting he is. I can’t have him. I can’t risk my job. Even if a guy like him was actually interested in a twenty-two year old virgin like me, I can’t give in. I’ve been in enough relationships to know how they all end: disaster. And if I lose my job, I lose the closest thing to a family I’ve had since my mother passed. But a fake engagement doesn't really count as a relationship… Right? **This is a full-length, standalone fake marriage romance. No cheating or cliffhangers, and as always, Happily Ever After guaranteed.
©2017 Publishing Bloom LLC (P)2018 Brilliance Publishing, Inc., all rights reserved.
Anyone But Cade
Summary
The second novel in USA Today bestselling author Penelope Bloom’s Anyone But... series turns up the heat and hilarity with a story about second chances and promises worth breaking. After Cade King cost me everything, I vowed I’d never fall for him again - even if he became rich and megafamous. Go figure. Now Cade is back with his billion-dollar company...and his ability to radiate attraction like a tempting Wi-Fi hotspot. Not to mention his tendency to have worse impulse control than a chimpanzee. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy it a little when I arrested him for disorderly conduct. Unfortunately, I think Cade liked it a little too. So when he asks for my help, I know exactly what I should say. But something’s fried the circuits in my brain. It doesn’t help that I can practically feel my ovaries humming to life just from standing within fifty yards of him. The bastard. Still, Cade doesn’t know the first thing about commitment. He lives completely in the moment. I’d need to have a recurring case of amnesia to believe he could change. I guess only time will tell which one of us is the real fool in the end.
©2019 Penelope Bloom (P)2019 Brilliance Publishing, Inc., all rights reserved.
Anyone But Nick
Summary
The third novel in USA Today bestselling author Penelope Bloom's Anyone But...series sizzles with a sexy and hilarious story about letting go of the past to chase the love of a lifetime. Seven years ago, I swore I'd never date Nick King. Ever. Now I'm supposed to work under him - and no, despite the way he glares like he wants to strip me bare, I mean he'll be my boss. But what better way to prove I'm really over him, right? I was a nerdy overachiever in high school, and Nick was my hopeless crush. I even laminated a note he passed to me; granted, I had a thing for laminators, but that's beside the point. Now, my only shot at getting my life back on track is to crawl to him on my knees and pray I nail the interview. Maybe I should pray that's the only thing that gets nailed in his office - especially since he looks like he wants to devour me. Nick broke my heart once. But hey, I'm still pretty handy with a laminator. Maybe I could run my heart through one before I take this job.
©2020 Penelope Bloom (P)2019 Brilliance Publishing, Inc., all rights reserved.
The Bodyguard
Summary
I never thought I’d see Makayla Pierson again. Then I was assigned to protect her. One week. No touching. Absolutely no sex. Just seven days of restraint... How hard can that be? When I walked away from Makayla ten years ago, I swore I’d never look back. So did she, after the haunting lie I told her...But it was the only way to keep her safe and as far away from me as possible. She’s better off without me. I don’t care if I’m broken without her. But years later, when I’m hired by her agent to act as her bodyguard, I can’t keep myself away, especially when I learn how much danger she's in. Now she’s mine for a week, and I’m not going to let anything happen to her. Even if she seems intent on making my life a living hell. She always did know how to hold a grudge. She doesn’t have to like me, she just has to follow every single one of my commands. There’s only one thing I’m not sure I can protect her from. Me. **This title was previously released as Protector. I've added over ten thousand words, making Makayla and Jesse's story sexier, packed with more intensity... and did I mention sexier? Fans of the original story will fall in love all over again, guaranteed. Also, this is a totally SAFE, full-length book with a happily ever after, no cheating, and plenty of steam. **
©2017 Publishing Bloom LLC. (P)2018 Brilliance Publishing, Inc., all rights reserved.
His Treat
Summary
Having a hot boss isn't complicated or confusing at all, said no one ever.... But all I have to do is resist for a few months. Come January, I'm flying to Paris to chase my dream of being an artist. Too bad I can't have my treat and eat it, too. I forgot to mention.... My hot boss was also my high school crush. Sort of. First, I wanted to crush him with gooey affection. In the end, I just plain wanted to crush him. Now he's back, and he might as well have "do not touch" printed on his chest. One tiny question: Would it count if I didn't use my hands? Let me answer my own question. Yes, Emily, you raging horndog, it counts. Besides, my dream is practically waiting for me like a perfectly wrapped shiny, little package if I can just behave. I'd be an absolute idiot to risk that, and I have a long, proud history of not being an idiot to protect. But all I have to do is one quick job for him. A few posters and a few props for a big Halloween party that he's hosting. Then I just walk away from his dreamboat eyes and perfect body, grab a plane, and forget about all the beautiful children we could've squeezed inside our white picket fence. Contains mature themes.
©2018 Penelope Bloom (P)2019 Tantor
Her Secret
Summary
I'll admit it. I messed up. Mistake #1: Asking Peter Barnidge for a job. Mistake #2: Accepting his offer instead of throwing it in his face like I planned. Mistake #3: In the interest of stopping before #99, I'll pretend the only other mistake was withholding one, tiny little nugget of truth during my interview. Peter Barnidge...I wish it was easier to just plain hate him, instead of the twisted, confusing blend of hatred and attraction I feel. He's the kind of hot that makes me want to do that Catholic cross thing every time I look at him, because one glance takes my brain straight to a world of sin. Speaking of sin...I also lied a little during my interview. But I'm a single mom and I'd do anything to provide for my daughter, even if it meant keeping one tiny little secret. I think it's only a matter of time before he finds out, and somehow, I don't think he's going to be happy when he does. Contains mature themes.
©2019 Penelope Bloom (P)2020 Tantor
His Package
Summary
Normally, I was more of a cat person. As in, if I had to choose who lives, I'm going to take the cat nine times out of 10. It's not that I particularly like cats, I just don't particularly like most people. My neighbor wasn't most people. He lived in the apartment across the hall, and he was your typical, buttoned-up, fancy shoes, smells like a Calvin Klein commercial, looks like he actually flosses kind of guy. I mean, seriously? Wasn't flossing just made up by dentists so they could go on their little power trips once every six months? The point was, this guy very obviously had his life all put together. He was Mr. Perfect, and If you asked me, he needed to be brought down a few pegs to wallow with the rest of us. Cue his long, thick, package penetrating my tight little mailbox. I accidentally dropped a knife on the package a few times back in my apartment. It basically sprang open on its own, and I had no choice but to look inside. His dirty little secret was staring me right in the face. As it turned out, Mr. Perfect wasn't so perfect. Who knew? Hint: I knew. And I was absolutely going to enjoy every second of what was coming. Contains mature themes.
©2018 Penelope Bloom (P)2020 Tantor
Dark
Summary
She had my baby and now she’s mine. Women know I’m a bad boy. They know that they should keep their distance, but they never do. All they ever get is one night. The dirtiest, wildest, hottest night of their lives. Court appointed shrink Dr. Julia Connors shouldn’t have been any different. She shouldn’t have changed me. But she did. She asked me to tell her how I felt. All I wanted to do was lay her down on that couch and make her scream my name. She was the only one I ever wanted a second night with. She was the only one I couldn’t take it from. And when old rivalries flared, I had to leave to keep her safe…I had to break her heart. When my enemies find her, nothing’s going to stop me from coming back to protect her and the son I never knew I had. I made a mistake by letting her go once, but I never make the same mistake twice. This is a standalone, full-length mafia romance with a filthy-mouthed, possessive bad boy. Happily ever after guaranteed.
©2018 Brilliance Audio, Inc. (P)2018
Anyone But Rich
Summary
From USA Today bestselling author Penelope Bloom comes the first novel in the romantic, sexy, and hilarious Anyone But… series. Seven years ago, my best friends and I made a promise: No matter what, we would never date one of the King brothers. Even if they grew up to become megafamous, gorgeous, heart-stopping billionaires. Even if they crawled on their knees and begged for forgiveness. But guess who just flew back into our lives in a private jet? And guess who just showed up to my job on my first day? Richard. King. Fortunately, it takes two seconds for Richard to reveal he hasn’t changed. Conceited. Cocky. Rude. Unfortunately, he’s also the kind of gorgeous that’s borderline offensive - with a jawline to make statues self-conscious and a grin that short-circuits my brain. He’s spent years taking what he wants. I doubt he’s hungry for anything else - except me, apparently. There’s no way I’ll let him maneuver his way back into my life. My friends would never forgive me. I would never forgive me. But did I mention his jawline?
©2019 Penelope Bloom (P)2019 Brilliance Publishing, Inc., all rights reserved.
Mine: A Bad Boy Mafia Romance
Summary
My enemies wish they had never met me, and women wish they could forget me. I’m busy carving a name for myself in the mafia underworld, and I don’t have time for the women who chase after me and wanna tie me down. They can get in line for the wildest f*ck of their lives and then they can get lost. I trusted the Sanatores and they ran their mouths. Six years in jail was a long time to plan my revenge, and now nobody will stop me from getting the payback I deserve. Not the bastards who are out to kill me, not the women who want to find out if the rumors about the size of my… ego are true. Nobody. Until I set eyes on her. Callie’s running from her filthy-rich, abusive, ex-fiancé, and he’s not letting her go without a fight. She wants a new life and the last thing she needs is me in it, but I’ve never let that stop me before. I shouldn’t have touched her. I knew a woman like her would cause me trouble. But I couldn’t resist. One taste and I’m addicted. Her ex wants to get her back and my enemies want to use her to hurt me. F**k that. Anyone who wants to come between us better bring a body bag. She’s MINE. This is a standalone, full-length mafia romance with a filthy-mouthed, possessive bad boy. Happily ever after guaranteed.
©2016 Publishing Bloom LLC (P)2018 Brilliance Publishing, Inc., all rights reserved