Tim Dorsey has 22 audiobooks on Listento.it, narrated by 3 narrators, with an average listener rating of 4.7★ across 12 ratings. The most-rated is Florida Roadkill.
Florida Roadkill
Summary
Sunshine State trivia buff Serge A. Storms loves eliminating jerks and pests. His drug-addled partner Coleman loves cartoons. Hot stripper Sharon Rhodes loves cocaine, especially when purchased with rich dead men's money. On the other hand, there's Sean and David, who love fishing and are kind to animals - and who are about to cross paths with a suitcase filled with $5 million in stolen insurance money. Serge wants the suitcase. Sharon wants the suitcase. Coleman wants more drugs... and the suitcase. In the meantime, there's murder by gun, Space Shuttle, Barbie doll, and Levi's 501s. In other words, welcome to Tim Dorsey's Florida - where nobody gets out unscathed and untanned!
©1999 Tim Dorsey (P)2011 Recorded Books, LLC
Nuclear Jellyfish
Summary
Just when you thought it was safe to go online... Serge has returned! That loveable collector of trivia, souvenirs, and murder methods is back with a new A-Tour of Florida. And this time he's out to set the record straight! Serge is upset that his beloved state isn't getting its proper recognition, so he sets up his own wildcat Internet travel-service site, hyper-blogging his way down the coast with his perpetually hammered sidekick, Coleman. Unfortunately Serge's Web presence catches the attention of his nemesis, Agent Mahoney, and the chase is on. Meanwhile, professional robbery crews have begun targeting trade show exhibitors, who may or may not be what they seem. Bodies begin piling up, and Serge has had enough! He's forced into the only logical course of action: shopping at the Home Depot. And this only raises more questions: Who is tutoring strippers through the community college? Where did all these diamonds come from? And does Lynyrd Skynyrd hold the key to everything? It's time to sign on with Serge and see where the twisting, sun-splashed trail leads in Nuclear Jellyfish!
©2009 Tim Dorsey (P)2009 HarperCollins Publishers
The Riptide Ultra-Glide
Summary
Welcome to Paradise! Freshly laid-off Wisconsinites Patrick and Barbara McDougall are going to sunny Florida for a modest romantic vacation. But the motel they picked isn't quite a pastel paradise, and they have to be midwesterners and make the best of a bad situation. Except bad goes to worse, and a string of misfortunes renders them unable to leave the state. Meanwhile, the next Mexican-American War is being fought, this time in Fort Lauderdale, between the Kentucky mafia and the Oxy cartel over control of the lucrative pain clinic market. Latinos are turning up dead, hillbillies are wandering the beach trampling sand castles, and cops continue arresting doctors wriggling out of office windows. But it's never really a party until Serge and Coleman arrive. Cruising down U.S. 1, Captain Florida and his perpetually altered sidekick are on a mission to film the best reality show ever! Back at their motel, the McDougalls are peeking out the curtains. They've become very popular, especially with Serge, who believes he's found the perfect stars for the pilot of his new TV series. Are the McDougalls safer with Serge or should they take their chances on the mean streets? Will Coleman get tired of signing autographs? Can pelicans be used as murder weapons? Is time running out for our heroes? And, finally, the question still on everyone's lips: What's up with Florida? Stay tuned for all the answers in...The Riptide Ultra-Glide!
©2013 Tim Dorsey (P)2013 HarperCollinsPublishers
Clownfish Blues
Summary
A (Serge A.) storm is brewing for a cabal of bad guys gaming the Florida state lottery in this insanely funny novel from the maestro of mayhem, Tim Dorsey. If you're loud and proud Floridian Serge A. Storms, how do you follow up your very own remake of Easy Rider? You shoot your own "episodes" of your favorite classic television show, Route 66! With Coleman riding shotgun, Serge is rolling down the highway of his dreams in a vintage silver convertible Corvette, just like the snazzy car Martin Milner drove. It doesn't matter that the actual Route 66 didn't pass through Florida, for Serge discovers that a dozen episodes near the series' end were filmed (really!) in his beloved home state. So for Serge and the always toked and stoked Coleman, the Sunshine State is all the road you need to get your kicks. But their adventure traveling the byways of the Sunshine State's underbelly is about to take a detour. Someone is trying to tilt the odds in the state lottery amid a conga line of huge jackpots, spinning off more chaos than any hurricane season. With this much at stake, of course every shady character wants in. Crooked bodega owners, drug cartels laundering money through the lottery, and venture capitalists are all trying to game the system - and lining up to get their cut. They're also gambling with their lives, because when Serge and Coleman get hip to this timely (and very lucrative) trip, there's no telling whose number is up next. Throw in Brooke Campanella, Serge's old flame, as well as the perpetually star-crossed Reevis, and it's a sure bet that the ever-lucky Serge will hit it big. Winning has never been this deadly - or this much fun!
©2017 Tim Dorsey (P)2017 HarperCollins Publishers
When Elves Attack
Summary
I’m dreaming of a Serge Christmas...Palm trees with twinkle lights... Santa’s big belly protruding over a neon Speedo.... It’s ho, ho, ho time in this hilarious and wacky Florida holiday tale, featuring bighearted psychopath Serge Storms and his sidekick, Coleman. Like Santa, Serge knows who’s been naughty and who’s been nice. Few can give with the generosity and creativity of Serge, and as December 24 rolls around, he is filling up the Serge sleigh with an unforgettable bag of presents. But before that, it’s all a big free-range Christmas office party, where Serge will be spreading his special cheer. And there’s that last-minute go-for-broke spree at the mall (just beware of those attacking elves - they bite). While you’re there, skip the lame photo on Santa’s lap - Serge will give you a lap ride you’ll never forget. As for that addled elf Coleman, there’s nothing like a white Christmas. Let it snow! So grab a six-pack, spike the eggnog, and hit the dunes on the beach as Serge and Coleman roast some nuts on an open fire and prove that reindeer really do know how to fly!
©2011 Tim Dorsey (P)2011 HarperCollinsPublishers
Hammerhead Ranch Motel
Summary
There's a different schemer or slimeball behind every door: cocaine duckpins who have survived only by the dumbest fortune, hard-luck gigolos desperate to score, undercover cops busting undercover cops who are running sting operations on undercover cops. And just down the row, local historian and spree killer Serge A. Storms -- who has stopped keeping up with his meds -- is still looking for a briefcase stuffed with five million dollars...and is now capable of wreaking more havoc than hurricane Rolando-berto, the big wind gathering force offshore, just waiting for the opportunity to blow everything straight to hell.
©2000 Tim Dorsey (P)2011 Recorded Books, LLC
Triggerfish Twist
Summary
Ensconced in a lovely tropical villa on idyllic Triggerfish Lane, Jim Davenport anticipates the good life to come. But this isn't living -- it's Florida, and the neighborhood is not quite what it seems. It's got overly aggressive Little League parents, drug-free Rastafarians, homicidal hookers, unnatural sex and casual violence. Oh, yes, and there's a psychopathic serial killer-cum-Sunshine-State folklorist named Serge A. Storms living directly across the street. So it's only a matter of time before Jim up and actually kills somebody...
©2002 Tim Dorsey (P)2011 Recorded Books, LLC
Tiger Shrimp Tango
Summary
All just another day in Serge Storms' sun-splashed paradise! Thanks to the growth of the Internet, America finds itself plagued by a noxious epidemic of ruthless scam artists. Where do they all come from? If you guessed 110 percent of them are spawned in Florida, you win the cigar.… When a new digital scheme goes horribly awry - causing innocents to die and a young woman to go missing - only one person can set things right: obsessive Florida trivia buff and reluctant serial killer Serge Storms. Aided by his perpetually addled sidekick, Coleman, and latter-day noir private eye Mahoney, Serge launches a crusade to rid his beloved state of predators and save the girl. But Serge's mission is hampered by one pesky little detail: He's being tracked by a hit man dispatched from his murky past. And all bets are off when Serge learns the same assassin is responsible for killing the love of his life years ago. It's not long before the two begin tracking each other around Florida in a frenzied Mobius loop. It's a dance only one can survive - it's the Tiger Shrimp Tango!
©2014 Tim Dorsey (P)2014 HarperCollinsPublishers
Gator A-Go-Go
Summary
That's right: Serge and Coleman do spring break! It's been a long time coming, but they're at the party now - and you¹ll never look at a Frisbee the same way again. One spring break location obviously isn't enough for Serge, so he must hit them all, traveling through various historic locales, spewing nuggets of history at anyone who won't run away and dispensing his own signature brand of Sunshine State justice. Along the way, he and his sidekick, Coleman, attract a growing following of the nation's top college students and a mysterious gang that leaves a trail of young bodies in their wake. Are the kids safer under Serge's protection? Or does being with him put them in more peril? The classroom and the pot brownies never prepared them for this. Which raises more questions: Who's the guy studying satellite photos? Where did the protected witness go? When did Coleman get all those trophies? Why are the Feds hot on everyone's trail? How did the burnt corpse end up by the pool? What's the best way to keep beer cool on the beach? Then there are the coke smugglers gone legit and a pair of the most dangerously sexy bartenders to ever mix a rum runner. Throw in some dirty dancing contests, illicit drugs, rockin' tunes, screamin' sports cars, bungee rides, pawned class rings, and church breakfasts, and you've got a potent concoction that keeps the hotel's concierge up all night stopping people from falling off the balconies. Want even more? Serge says, "You got it!" After years of quiet, a legendary Miami kingpin from the anything-goes '80s is suddenly back in the news, along with one of the state's most psychotic homicidal monsters, every bit as criminally insane as Serge - except without the morals. And the mysteries continue to mount....
©2010 Tim Dorsey (P)2010 HarperCollins Publishers
Atomic Lobster
Summary
Why is everyone rushing to flee Tampa on a cruise ship to hell? Serge is back with a bullet, torn between homicide and souvenirs. So is Coleman, torn between getting hammered and getting more hammered. Then there's good ol' Jim Davenport, the E-Team, the Diaz Brothers, and Johnny Vegas, the Accidental Virgin, cranking up the fevered action as the pot boils over on a street called Lobster Lane. It's reunion time in the Sunshine State, and we're not just talking the family jamboree of that blood-soaked criminal clan, the McGraws, whose nastiest, meanest member is finally released from prison and heads south bent on revenge. On top of it all, the government is covering up a growing list of mysterious victims across Florida who may or may not be connected to a nefarious plot being hatched against national security. But wait! There's more on the horizon! Who is the oddly familiar femme fatale named Rachael? Is Serge wrong that guns, drugs, and strippers don't mix? What sets the Non-Confrontationalists off on a rampage? What finally brings Coleman and Lenny together? Will they succeed in building the biggest bong ever? And can Serge surf a rogue wave to victory? Batten the hatches, don the life jackets, and take cover as all these questions and more are answered in the latest adventure from the acclaimed author of Hurricane Punch. Listen to Hurricane Punch.
©2008 Tim Dorsey (P)2008 HarperCollins Publishers
The Stingray Shuffle
Summary
In his latest bizarre concoction, Dorsey picks up - sort of - various plot strands from his earlier books, including Florida Roadkill, Hammerhead Ranch Motel, and Orange Crush. There's still the matter, you see, of the briefcase full of cash, and still unresolved are the stories of Serge Storms, the serial killer and history buff; Johnny Vegas, the startlingly handsome virgin; Jethro Maddox, the Hemingway look-alike; and Paul, the Passive-Aggressive Private Eye. Fans of Dorsey's magnificently off-kilter adventures will be thrilled to rejoin these characters and to meet a host of new ones, including Mr. Granda, the leader of a down-and-out drug cartel who is looking to buy a submarine, and Ralph Krunkleton, one of America's very worst novelists, whose novel The Stingray Shuffle features prominently in the goings-on. A brilliantly constructed romp that is part thriller, part farce, and entirely, gloriously, deliriously wacky.
©2003 Tim Dorsey (P)2011 Recorded Books,LLC
Electric Barracuda
Summary
Serge Storms, that loveable thermonuclear vigilante and one-stop Florida-trivia shop, has been leaving corpses strewn across the Sunshine State for more than a decade. The authorities - especially one tenacious state agent - have begun to notice the exponential body count and send a police task force to track down Serge. Could his luck finally have run out? Meanwhile, armed with his perpetually baked sidekick, Coleman, Serge decides to blitz the state and resurrect his internet travel-advice website - which, of course, must be the finest and the final word on trekking the Sunshine State. To up the ante, Serge concocts a theme vacation for his cyberspace audience. And that theme? You, too, can experience Florida through the eyes of a fugitive. Off they go blogging along a getaway route through the state's most remote bayous, back roads, and bars, where the number of cadavers begin stacking up like Serge's website hits. Clues and questions mount: Who are all the women being photographed naked in the swamp? What made Coleman draw on his face with magic markers? Where is the cruise-to-nowhere taking its drunk prisoners? When was the last time a Civil War reenactment involved a sports car? But Serge also has some personal business to tidy up. His grandfather's old Miami Beach gang suddenly had their life savings wiped out, and there's a good bet it was no accident. Too much action for Serge to juggle? Not when it all dovetails nicely into his Secret Master Plan. And especially if it involves Serge's favorite new obsession: tracking Al Capone's little-known escapades in the Everglades. So gas up the car, say good-bye to the relatives, and join Serge on the lam as he drives straight for the deepest bowels of Florida to unravel the final mysteries of Electric Barracuda.
©2011 Tim Dorsey (P)2011 HarperCollins Publishers
Hurricane Punch
Summary
Welcome to another typical summer in Florida, the season of the storms. Serge Storms. Serial killer Serge A. Storms, that loveable, under-under-medicated dispenser of truth, justice, and trivia is back with a vengeance. And not a weirdness-laced moment too soon. His cherished home state is about to take a beating, and from far more than the way-too-routine conga line of hurricanes bearing down on the peninsula. Corpses have begun turning up at a disturbing rate, even for Florida, and it looks like a brutal serial killer is on the loose. Serge vows to stop at nothing in his campaign to make All Things Right - unless if he gets bored or distracted by a cool souvenir or a whatever. But his path won't be obstacle free. Agent Mahoney has picked up the scent. The obsessive criminal profiler is convinced there is no second killer. Then there's Coleman, whose triathlete approach to the sport of polyabuse binging just might derail the mission more than the entire police community put together. The pace picks up. Winds howl, TV reporters fly around the beach, and questions mount: Who's stalking Tampa Bay's most sensitive journalist? Do multiple orgasms improve storm tracking? Why is the feeding-tube guy so quiet? All of which ultimately leads to the most pressing question on everyone's new-millennium lips: What would Serge do?
©2007 by Tim Dorsey (P)2007 HarperCollins Publishers
Shark Skin Suite
Summary
Bottom-feeders beware: the Sunshine State's favorite psychotic killer and lovable Floridaphile, Serge Storms, has found a new calling, legal eagle, and he's going to make a killing as a crusading attorney - and star as a dashing lawyer on the big screen - in this madcap escapade from insanely funny New York Times best-selling author Tim Dorsey. When it comes to swimming with the sharks, there is no bigger kahuna than Serge Storms. Bingeing on a marathon of legal movies set in Florida, Serge finds his vocation: the law. Never mind law school or that degree; Serge becomes a freelance fixer - wildcat paralegal and pilgrim to the hallowed places where legal classics of the big screen such as Body Heat, Cool Hand Luke, and Absence of Malice were filmed practically in his own backyard. One of Serge's old flames, young lawyer Brook Campanella, is also a rising star thanks to her expertise in the field of foreclosure law. Ruthless at taking down the greedy banksters kicking people out of their homes, she lands a major class-action lawsuit and looks set to win big. The opposition is determined to shut her down, and they'll go to extreme lengths to do it. Luckily for her, Serge likes nothing better than saving a damsel in distress, especially when it means kicking a bunch of shyster butt. The mayhem comes to a hilarious head at the Key West courthouse at the height of the island's raucous Fantasy Fest street carnival, and no one, including Serge, will ever be the same.
©2015 Tim Dorsey (P)2015 HarperCollins Publishers
Pineapple Grenade
Summary
Miami has always set the weirdness bar, but Serge Storms is back in action and ready to pole vault over it. First, there's the media frenzy over the “Hollow Man”, a gutless corpse found on the beach. And yet people think it’s perfectly normal to find dead sharks in the middle of downtown boulevards - or to spot black mushroom clouds behind the airport. Then there are the roving bands of carjackers who suddenly find themselves inconvenienced. Not to mention people lurking outside sex-addiction meetings. Could this be the work of Serge, that eccentric trivialista and one-man vigilante? And why is he extensively photographing foreign consulates right before the critically important Summit of the Americas comes to town? Does it have something to do with Serge’s declaration to tell his ever-stoned sidekick, Coleman, that he’s decided to become a spy? Of course he’s not working for anyone yet, so Serge is content to just spy for himself until he shows up on radar and his talents are appreciated. His ace in the hole? Serge’s newly revamped Secret Master Plan! His spider senses tell him something big is about to go down in Miami, and it just might involve the recently reactivated CIA cell operating in the same historic building that plotted the overthrow of Fidel Castro. The intelligence community isn't amused, and they want answers: How did Serge and Coleman get so cozy with the president of a banana republic? Who is the femme fatale with a heart of gold - and national pride? Why is the congressman in favor of the latest oil spill? When did everyone in the city forget how to drive? And what about the Most Laid Man in Miami? Meanwhile, a mysterious international man of intrigue is shipping military arms around the clock, in competition with clandestine flights of souvenirs, causing the office of Homeland Security to take measures against people who aren’t scared enough. The crossfire of chaos continues to escalate as Serge plays Extreme Dominos in Little Havana, hurtling everyone toward a fateful climax that seems destined for the hemispheric summit jamboree on the shores of Biscayne Bay. So put on your favorite pink flamingo shirt, hit the dunes of South Beach, and find all the answers in... Pineapple Grenade!
©2012 Tim Dorsey (P)2012 HarperCollinsPublishers
Coconut Cowboy
Summary
Channeling his inner Easy Rider, Serge Storms saddles up for his most epic, lethal, and hilarious road trip ever as he revvs off to find the lost American dream...starting in the Florida Panhandle. Obsessed with the iconic '60s classic Easy Rider, encyclopedic Floridaphile, lovable serial killer, and movie buff extraordinaire Serge A. Storms devises his wildest plan yet: finish the journey begun by his freewheeling heroes, Captain America and Billy, tragically cut short by some shotgun-wielding rednecks. Setting a course for the Florida Panhandle, Captain Serge - with Coleman literally riding shotgun - mounts his classic motorcycle and hits the highway in search of the real America: the apple-pie-eating, freedom-swilling moms and pops of Main Street USA. But the America he finds in the rural burgs dotting the neck of the peninsula is a little bit different...and a whole lot weirder than anything Peter Fonda and Dennis Hopper encountered. In a state where criminal politicians are more common than gators, Serge and Coleman discover one particular speed-trap locale so aggressively inept at corruption that investigators are baffled about where to start. Expect nothing less than madness, mayhem, ingenious homicides, and mind-altering pharmaceuticals when Serge and Coleman's path intersects with the Sunshine State's hyper-dysfunctional rusticity. Where's Jack Nicholson when you need him?
©2016 Tim Dorsey (P)2016 HarperCollins Publishers
Cadillac Beach
Summary
Serge A. Storms is back! The one-man crime spree hits no speed bumps as he swings through Tampa, Disney World, and parts south before settling down in Miami Beach to team up with a former sidekick and launch his long-overdue offbeat travel service. It's a labor of love as Serge forces customers to confront the underbelly of the Sunshine State's past and present. Some clients get it; others run for their lives. No matter. Bullets fly, cars crash, bodies pile up, fireballs reach into the sky, local lore is recited. The tour continues. Our overachieving antihero has a full to-do list, and he multitasks during the tourist juggernaut to battle the Palermo crime family, mystery assassins, local police, the FBI, the CIA, Fidel Castro, and telemarketers. Serge is also out to solve a forty-year-old mystery involving the infamous "Murph the Surf" gem heist. Could this be what got his grandfather killed? So we jump into the time machine to meet his eccentric granddad, Sergio, who is running a small-time bookie operation in 1964 Miami Beach, a golden time and place populated by the Beatles, Cassius Clay, James Bond, Jackie Gleason, and Flipper. Back to live action! Serge and his customers have become the hunted, hopscotching through a series of famous hotel rooms. But Serge tells them not to worry. He has a master plan, which is about to unfold in all of its insane glory...on Cadillac Beach!
©2005 Tim Dorsey (P)2005 Recorded Books, LLC
Torpedo Juice
Summary
Internationally best-selling author Tim Dorsey's irreverent and hilarious novels starring evil genius Serge A. Storms, lovable psychiatric hospital escapee, zoom along at breakneck speed, delivering laughs and shocks in droves. In Torpedo Juice Serge heads for the Florida Keys, where, curiously enough, he isn't the saltiest nut in the jar. Since it's always a good idea to fly under police radar, Serge figures the Keys are just the place to lie low. Plus, he has two missions to accomplish: re-invent himself and get married, although he hasn't picked the lucky lady yet. But what he doesn't know is that enough serial and spree killers are headed his way to have a parade of psychopaths. Are the Keys big enough for all the lunatics?
©2005 Tim Dorsey (P)2005 Recorded Books, LLC.
Naked Came the Florida Man
Summary
The "compulsively irreverent and shockingly funny" (Boston Globe) Tim Dorsey returns with an insanely entertaining tale in which the inimitable Serge A. Storms sees dead people and investigates a creepy urban myth that may be all too real. Though another devastating hurricane is raking Florida, its awesome power can’t stop the Sunshine State’s most loyal son, Serge A. Storms, from his latest scenic road trip: a cemetery tour. With his best bro Colman riding shotgun, Serge hits the highway in his ’69 gold Plymouth Satellite, putting pedal to the metal on a grand tour of the past. Beginning in Key West, the sunshine boys’ odyssey includes a forgotten mass grave in Palm Beach County holding the remains of African Americans killed by the Great Hurricane of 1928, and the resting place of one world-famous television dolphin (RIP Flipper) from the 1960s. But one deadland - a haunted old sugar field - holds more than just the bones of those who’ve passed. For years, local children have whispered about a boogeyman hiding among the stalks. Could it be the same maniac known as Naked Florida Man who’s been raising hell all over the place? There are few things Serge loves more than solving a good mystery and bestowing justice on miscreants who sully his beloved home’s good name. With his partner bong boy, Florida’s psycho superhero will find the truth in this hilariously violent delight - packed with history, lore, and plenty of motel antics - from the insanely ingenious Tim Dorsey.
©2019 Tim Dorsey (P)2019 HarperAudio
Orange Crush
Summary
Praising Tim Dorsey’s tongue-in-cheek humor, the Miami Herald wrote, “Nobody, but nobody, writes like this guy.” Here Florida politics take the main stage in a rollicking satire that proves Dorsey’s at the top of his game. When a traumatic experience forever changes Florida gubernatorial race candidate Marlon Conrad’s life, he hits the road in a Winnebago to find the “real” Florida. But his odyssey is plagued with would-be assassins and cutthroat journalists.
©2001 Tim Dorsey (P)2011 Recorded Books, LLC